“As small children we very much depend on the kindness of our parents. Again in old age we depend on the kindness of others. Between childhood and old age we falsely believe we are independent, but this is not so.” Dalai Lama
I’m a very independent person. I love my space, can’t work well when others are popping in and out of my space and would prefer a quiet walk over attending a crowded party most days. But the longer I am with my partner and the more time I spend around kids, the more noticeable it is when they aren’t around. I still love my space and always will, but nothing can replace the gift of spending time with someone who loves life.
Our society has done a very good job of keeping us connected and dependent on each other, from the complications of technology to the amazing service that the men and women of the cleanup crews provide, there’s no way we could survive without others. But we choose to see ourselves as separate entities and not dependent on each other. It’s one reason some of the senior citizens are reluctant to enter homes or communities that would help them thrive in their last years.
Part of the reason for our distrust of the kindness of others is that they have let us down. Yes, I’ve been let down many times before, and I will be again in the future. But I continue to believe that we’re better off together than we ever are apart. And when we learn how to work together we’ll be in even better shape.
This week I encourage you to open your heart up a little bit and put some extra dependence on someone you trust, like your partner or a close friend. They don’t have to take over your life, just give them a part of it that you would usually be responsible for and trust them to do it for you. If you do it with your partner it can be a trust building activity as they can have you do something in return too.