What Love Really Is

Today is Valentine’s Day in the US. I always love talking about relationships and the potential of romantic love. I’m thankful to have been with my significant other for as long as we have been together, he blesses me in so many ways. Today technically is a day to focus on relationships, but I did share about romantic love on my other blog. Today I want to talk about what love really is.

The dictionary defines love as ‘affection for another person,’ ‘a feeling of warm personal attachment,’ and ‘wholehearted liking for or pleasure in something.’ Through these definitions we’re reminded that love is a good thing, that it should make the world a better place when we choose love. It doesn’t say that love is the easiest thing in the world or that there won’t be tough days, but overall having love in your life should make your life better as well as the lives of those around you. When you choose to live with love it should inspire and encourage others to live with love as well.

Love is also incredible because it crosses many boundaries and makes things possible that aren’t possible without love. Love is also eternal, it surpasses any and all time and location and even life limits we put on many other things. Love can make loss a little less painful, knowing that we were blessed to love them and them us for the time that we did.

Today, quite simply, whether you’re in a relationship or not, I want you to know that you’re loved and lovable. There’s nothing wrong with you that can’t be fixed, resolved, overcome or accepted with love and the support of those who love you. There’s almost nothing going on in your life that can’t be made better with a little love. Love is a choice, I hope that you choose to live with love today.

“When we know that we are loved, we will quite naturally love in return…” Br. David Vryhof

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The Freedom To Love

This past month I’ve been looking into a lot of church marketing, growth, health and support topics and seminars. It’s got me thinking again about how people see the Church (any faith organization that fits under the ‘Christianity’ heading), and the people who attend. The world around us has done some serious changing over the past few decades and the Church hasn’t fully caught up. I can understand because it raises fears and questions of healthy boundaries and what is/isn’t secular/spiritual and how it all works together, if it does. But in many ways these fears and the slow and lacking transformation that have accompanied them have held the church back from embracing and investing in the digital mission field.

So going back to how people outside of the church view those inside of the church as well as the church itself, many see it as a restrictive and boring thing, with serious walls between church people and those outside the church, where you can’t do anything wrong (even though forgiveness is a discussed topic). And there is some truth in all of this, especially in churches that have a very old school culture and aren’t interested in making changes. For those of us in the church, the limitations and rules sometimes may feel restrictive, but often they result in bigger and better freedoms than those outside the church ever experience.

One of the most notable is one that’s very prevalent this week, and that’s the topic of love. One of the things we’re called to do, and free to do as much as we want, is to love others with the love that God teaches us about and Jesus modeled for us during His ministry. The word love is used throughout the Bible over 600 times depending on the translation, and is something that Jesus specifically challenges us to do. So as you work through the rest of this week including Valentine’s Day, I would encourage you to pick up that challenge and show love to those you interact with, in both big and little ways.

“You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love.” Galatians 5:13

Reality Reflections: Remembering Love

Lately I’ve been thinking about the topic of remembering. I’ve talked before about my habit of writing down thoughts as they come to me and always having a piece of paper next to me at my desk so that I can keep doing what I’m doing and writing down a thought or thing I have to do so I don’t forget it. And it got me thinking about all of the memory keeping we do. We use social media to record our lives, we use calendars on our devices to keep track of our lives and plans, we use search engines to learn facts and figure things out. What do we remember any more?

Quite frankly we don’t have to remember too much. We can find almost anything with a few clicks. So what are we remembering? Are we really taking the time to commit to memory the things that matter most in our lives or are we just letting them go digital and assuming we’ll be able to find them when we need them?

My partner has a better memory than I do for things like dates and numbers and even things we’ve done together too. Maybe you’re the one in the relationship who remembers things, or maybe you’re like me and you don’t remember as much as you maybe wish you could. Maybe you don’t take the time to remember because you’re scared the memories won’t be as good as you thought they were or you think it may hurt too much to remember someone you loved and now isn’t part of your life. But all of the memories, all of the events, all of the people are part of your life and who you are today.

Not all memories, events or people were good, but I believe that there are more good ones in there than you remember, memories that you’ll want to treasure some day or share with someone else. Don’t let your fear of remembering the not-so-good hinder you from remembering the good.

Hope for 2019

The new year is just a few hours away and you may be one of the many who are celebrating the end of 2018. It’s not wrong to celebrate being done with something that was less than awesome, but it’s better to celebrate what’s ahead. You should never celebrate what’s done (and not great) with the enthusiasm, longevity or passion that you celebrate what’s yet to come or the victories you’ve achieved.

So I’m going to celebrate what’s ahead, the new possibilities that are coming in 2019, the opportunities to change and grow, the people I will meet, the days to enjoy the world, the transformations of nature, the successes in business and relationships, the victories I will help bring about, the relationships I help build, the ways that humanity gets to grow, and the ways we get to support each other.

Every day brings with it choices we have to make. I would hope that you choose to enter into 2019 with hope, joy, confidence and an attitude ready to conquer whatever comes your way. To make 2019 a year that you lived and loved and dreamed to your fullest. To enjoy 2019 with new friends and old. To being a year of laughing more.

“Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain… To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices – today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.” Kevyn Aucoin

What God Asks of Us

Recently I have been thinking about the plans that God has for our lives and how they all work out. So today I thought I would share some verses I came across about what God asks of us and calls us to:

To be forgiving: “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” Colossians 3:13

To live with honor: “If we live, it’s to honor the Lord. And if we die, it’s to honor the Lord. So whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.” Romans 14:8

To live with and show mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience: “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” Colossians 3:12

To do what is right, love mercy and be humble: “No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8

To pursue righteousness and unfailing love: “Whoever pursues righteousness and unfailing love will find life, righteousness, and honor.” Proverbs 21:21

To be a servant: “‘The greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.'” Matthew 23:11-12

The things God has called us to and asked of us aren’t things we have to do alone, nor can we, they all require that we work with others to make it happen. This week I encourage you to choose one of the things God has called you to and make it a part of your life.  God doesn’t ask us to do or be things without a reason, I pray that He reveals some of that to you as you work with Him this week.

The Simplicity of Love

This month one of the things we’ve talked about is simplicity, and when we think about that topic it’s often with regards to how we can simplify our lives. While there are some more things going on now than there were years ago, simply because we can get things done faster, I think the bigger change is in that we’re aware of all that’s going on around the world. So it’s not technically that there’s that much more going on, it’s that we’re aware of what’s going on in cities and homes around the globe, and not just in our little town where we live.

To an extent we see this with all of the traveling that was done in the Bible, because if the people who are the main characters in the Bible didn’t travel we wouldn’t know about all of the other people who existed with them. Jesus too touched so many people because He traveled to where they were. Yes, some came to see Him because they heard great things, but a big part of His ministry was going to the people where they were physically and meeting them where they were in their lives.

Aside from Jesus being the Son of God, people came to see Him for one big reason: love. While Jesus didn’t recommend or celebrate sin, He didn’t turn away the people who were sinners, especially those that the world looked down upon for one reason or another. Jesus chose to love them for not only who they were but who they were made to be. Jesus could give them the forgiveness they needed to move on with their lives as well as the love to help them break free from their past.

We aren’t able to do all that Jesus can, and I don’t think we have to. We just have to choose to live with love. When we choose to love others regardless of who they are or what they’ve done it gives us a greater chance to build a healthy relationship with them, and for them to see that not everyone is a judgmental jerk. It’s a simple and complicated as choosing love as your first emotion, feeling and thought whenever you are with others.

“Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13

Taking Time to Listen

Given the events of the last week as well as the big meeting between two world powers happening somewhere half way around the world, today I thought we’d take a look at the words of Proverbs 8:33: “Listen to my instruction and be wise. Don’t ignore it.”

My heart hurts whenever someone chooses to end their life before God has determined it’s their time. The world lost two public figures last week to suicide, Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade. While we may never know what truly caused them to make that decision, many who choose suicide do so because they don’t have hope, don’t believe life could get better, don’t feel heard or have been so beaten down they can’t take it anymore. Statistics show that on average over 100 people choose suicide each day, which is a really scary number, and means there are thousands of hurting families out there.

The Bible teaches us that we should love our neighbors, that we should be giving and support each other, that we should look out for women and children, to trust that the God who knows the petals on a flower and all the creatures of the sea could look out for the little details of our lives, and that God has a plan for good for our lives. But these are not assurances that everyone knows because not everyone knows the Bible.

These aren’t just spiritual messages, they’re life messages. Anyone can love, listen and be compassionate, regardless of race, sex, age, location, or language. Are you taking the time to listen to the people in your life? To the ways they’re trying to help you and things they’re trying to tell you? I encourage you to choose love and compassion this week, to stop and listen when people speak, to make time to listen to what God is trying to tell you, and make time for those who are most important to you.